i want,
what i really want,
is a guy,
just one guy,
whom i can run to, with tears falling down,
and th first thing he'd say when he sees me is,
"whose ass am i kickin, babe ?"

people get pissed, cos i built a wall, thinking i am blocking them out, but really, i just wanna see, who loves me enough, to climb over it.
and now, i wonder, if i dropped my fake smile, and tears flowed down, what would happen.
because my heart dont belong here.
because i cant do this anymore.
living with lies.

mood swings are getting to me,
argh,
argh,
argh,
argh,
damn tired.
tmr theres skewl, then th entire routine of life starts again.
haish.

St.pats sucks.
Th guys are horrible.
Th girls are disgusting.
Like seriously, they stoop so low that they're bloody bra can be seen.
WTF lah.
It was stupid but yeah, morning was okay, but aft that my mood just flew away.
Haish, it's my birthday, and it sucks.
Literally.
Bye for now,

bullshit.

idk what to do or say anymore.
once again, i find myself seacrhing.
and then, i wonder,
what th hell am i searching for.
what is missing.
everything.
everyone.
that i love, is here. right next to me.
so, whats wrong.
do i push everyone away, again ?
or bring them closer towards me ?
how do i explain to them, what im feeling.
without doubts.
i wouldnt be surprised if i find myself crawling back into one.

didnt go to skewl today, flu got too bad.
tomorrow isnt going to be a good day, at all.
i feel it right down to my gut.

lets expect th unexpected.

can i be a shooting star,
flying through th sky,
never falling,
never raining
?

CCA NOW :D

haish.
today.
was.
not.
a.
good.
day.
its not gonna be th same anymore.
i dont have anything to post,
cos whatever i type would hurt.
not hurt, but create doubts.
haish.
debating if i shouldnt come skewl tmr.
becos th world is a much better place,
without me.
and thats how it'll be.
i dont need sorries.
i dont need explanations.
you ask, "you okay ?"
what else is there to say then,
"of cos. why wouldnt i be."
but really, they are a hundred reason why i shouldnt be.

im gonna throw my hands up, and give up.
wdv thats gonna happen,
will happen for a reason,
and i'll just go along.
not a sound.
Why ?
because,
i promised i'd be there,
and im keeping that promise till th end.

-i know its complicated,
but baby, im a loser in love.-

-look into me,
what do you see ?
is it just this face ?
or more than this smile ?
because this facade is fading.-

this sucks.
life sucks.
love sucks.

today was a bloody moody day.
everything went wrong again.
this hearts torn into two.
like.
dont like.
forget.
dont forget.
i plunged into this so many times, and always ended up where i started.
what if i decide to never fall again ?
should i ?
should i just turn th other way and never look back.
i am not afraid to say, ive never regretted a thing in my life.
but now,
why.
why is it all happening again.
i can smile and let it go.
but now i cant.
but whats there to give ?
for i,
have nothing left to give.

hell it.
i dont know what to do alr.
or say.
or feel.
i dont like it.
i hate it.
right now, if i could go back to th moment when i never turned and smiled, oh so accidentally, i wouldnt have. i would never have, if i knew it would lead to this.
bloodyhell.
its so wrong yet so right.
bloodyhell.
bloodyhell.
speechless.

oh hell.

i wanna be a shooting star.
flying in th sky.
but now.
im falling.
hitting th ground.
catch me, will you.
please.
cos ive fallen.
fallen for you.

okay, thats all. :)
haish.
made a huge decision during yesterday.
and i dont know if it was right. or wrong.
because i listened to my heart.
and once again,
i wouldnt be surprised if i ended up where i started.
heartbroken.
now, im left speechless.